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Crude Novelty Products

Crazy Novelty Guy offers a large selection of "crude" novelty products. Many of these products are nasty, raunchy, offensive and down right repulsive. This is why we have these tucked away in this special little corner of our website.

If you are weak willed, easily offended, or otherwise have no sense of humor, this section of our website is not for you. Please turn back now!

However, if you want a good laugh and wish to view some of our best-selling unique novelty stickers, magnets and signs, please continue scrolling. 

Viewer discretion is advised! Enjoy!!!

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Patch - I Apologize in Advance For Staring At Your TitsMade In The USA
Patch, Embroidered Patch, I Apologize in Advance For Staring At Your Tits, 4" x 1.5" Sale price$7.99
Patch - All Grown Up & Still Fascinated With Nipples!Made In The USA
Patch, Embroidered Patch, All Grown Up & Still Fascinated With Nipples!, 4" x 2" Sale price$7.49
Patch - It's Only Kinky The First TimeMade In The USA
Patch, Embroidered Patch, It's Only Kinky The First Time, 4" x 1.5" Sale price$7.99
Patch - I See Your Point But You're Still Full of ShitMade In The USA
Patch, Embroidered Patch, I See Your Point But You're Still Full of Shit, 4" x 2" Sale price$7.99
Patch - Don't Make Me Open This Can, 100% Whoop AssMade In The USA
Patch, Embroidered Patch, Don't Make Me Open This Can, 100% Whoop Ass, 4" x 2" Sale price$7.99
Funny Warning Magnet - I Rode The Short BusFunny Warning Magnet Made in the United States
Magnet, Funny Warning Magnet, I Rode The Short Bus, Practical Jokes, Gags, Pranks, 6" x 3" Sale price$7.99
Funny Warning Magnet - I Love Dick PicsLifestyle Image - Truck Bumper
Magnet, Funny Warning Magnet, I Love Dick Pics, Practical Jokes, Gags, Pranks, 6" x 3" Sale price$7.99
Funny Warning Magnet - Get Your Own Fucking ToolsFunny Warning Magnet Made in the United States
Magnet, Funny Warning Magnet, Get Your Own Fucking Tools, 6" x 3" Sale price$7.99
Funny Warning Magnet - Driver Is Hung Like A ChipmunkFunny Warning Magnet Made in the United States
Magnet, Funny Warning Magnet, Driver Is Hung Like A Chipmunk, Practical Jokes, Gags, Pranks, 6" x 3" Sale price$7.99
Funny Warning Magnet - Driver Does Not Give A Flying FuckMagnet, Funny Warning Magnet, Driver Does Not Give A Flying Fuck, 6" x 3"
Magnet, Funny Warning Magnet, Driver Does Not Give A Flying Fuck, 6" x 3" Sale price$7.99
Funny Warning Magnet - Bad Ass Motherfucker On BoardFunny Warning Magnet Made in the United States
Magnet, Funny Warning Magnet, Bad Ass Motherfucker On Board, 6" x 3" Sale price$7.99
Patch - Money Talks, Bullshit WalksMade In The USA
Patch, Embroidered Patch, Money Talks, Bullshit Walks, 4" x 1.5" Sale price$7.99
Patch - You Are About To Earn Your, "I Just Got My Ass Kicked" PatchMade In The USA
Patch, Embroidered Patch, You Are About To Earn Your, "I Just Got My Ass Kicked" Patch, 4" x 2" Sale price$7.99
Funny Warning Sign - Keep Your Dick Beaters Off My ToolsFunny Warning Signs - Made in the USA!
Sign, Funny Warning Sign, Plastic, Keep Your Dick Beaters Off My Tools, 10" x 6" Sale price$9.99
Funny Warning Sign - Get Your Own Fucking ToolsFunny Warning Signs - Made in the USA!
Sign, Funny Warning Sign, Plastic, Get Your Own Fucking Tools, 10" x 6" Sale price$9.99
Funny Warning Sign - Don't Fuck With Me, Out of AmmoFunny Warning Signs - Made in the USA!
Sign, Funny Warning Sign, Plastic, Don't Fuck With Me, Out of Ammo, 10" x 6" Sale price$9.99
Patch - Gynaemicromastrophobia (The Fear of Women With Small Boobs)Made In The USA
Patch, Embroidered Patch, Gynaemicromastrophobia (The Fear of Women With Small Boobs), 4" x 2" Sale price$7.99
Patch - If You Can't Dazzle Them With Brilliance, Baffle Them With BSMade In The USA
Patch, Embroidered Patch, If You Can't Dazzle Them With Brilliance, Baffle Them With Bullshit, 4" x 1.5" Sale price$7.99
Patch - When I Die Bury Me Face Down So The Whole World Can Kiss My Ass! Made In The USA
Patch, Embroidered Patch, When I Die Bury Me Face Down So The Whole World Can Kiss My Ass!, 4" x 1.5" Sale price$7.99
Patch - Asshole Merit Badge Made In The USA
Patch, Embroidered Patch, Asshole Merit Badge, 3.5" Round Sale price$7.99
Funny Warning Sticker - My Other Ride Is Your MomFunny Warning Sticker Made in the USA
Sticker, Funny Warning Sticker, My Other Ride Is Your Mom, 6" x 3" Sale price$7.49
Funny Warning Sticker - Driver Is Probably DrunkFunny Warning Sticker Made in the USA
Sticker, Funny Warning Sticker, Driver Is Probably Drunk, 6" x 3" Sale price$7.49
Funny Warning Sticker - I'm So Gay, I Can't Even Drive StraightFunny Warning Sticker Made in the USA
Sticker, Funny Warning Sticker, I'm So Gay, I Can't Even Drive Straight, 6" x 3" Sale price$7.49
Funny Warning Sticker - Bad Ass LatinaFunny Warning Sticker Made in the USA
Sticker, Funny Warning Sticker, Bad Ass Latina, 6" x 3" Sale price$7.49
Funny Warning Sticker - Bad Ass CubanFunny Warning Sticker Made in the USA
Sticker, Funny Warning Sticker, Bad Ass Cuban, 6" x 3" Sale price$7.49
Funny Warning Sticker - Bad Ass HispanicFunny Warning Sticker Made in the USA
Sticker, Funny Warning Sticker, Bad Ass Hispanic, 6" x 3" Sale price$7.49
Funny Warning Sticker - Bad Ass Puerto RicanFunny Warning Sticker Made in the USA
Sticker, Funny Warning Sticker, Bad Ass Puerto Rican, 6" x 3" Sale price$7.49
Funny Warning Sticker - Bad Ass JamaicanFunny Warning Sticker Made in the USA
Sticker, Funny Warning Sticker, Bad Ass Jamaican, 6" x 3" Sale price$7.49
Funny Warning Sticker - Bad Ass TexanFunny Warning Sticker Made in the USA
Sticker, Funny Warning Sticker, Bad Ass Texan, 6" x 3" Sale price$7.49
Funny Warning Sticker - Bad Ass LatinoFunny Warning Sticker Made in the USA
Sticker, Funny Warning Sticker, Bad Ass Latino, 6" x 3" Sale price$7.49
Funny Warning Sticker - Bad Ass DominicanFunny Warning Sticker Made in the USA
Sticker, Funny Warning Sticker, Bad Ass Dominican, 6" x 3" Sale price$7.49
Bumper Sticker - Bad Ass Brazilian Funny Warning Sticker Made in the USA
Sticker, Funny Warning Sticker, Bad Ass Brazilian, 6" x 3" Sale price$7.49
Funny Warning Sticker - Bad Ass MexicanFunny Warning Sticker Made in the USA
Sticker, Funny Warning Sticker, Bad Ass Mexican, 6" x 3" Sale price$7.49
Funny Warning Sticker - Don't Touch My Shit (Spanish Version)Funny Warning Sticker Made in the USA
Sticker, Funny Warning Sticker, Don't Touch My Shit (Spanish Version), 6" x 3" Sale price$7.49
Funny Warning Sticker - Driver Is GayFunny Warning Sticker Made in the USA
Sticker, Funny Warning Sticker, Driver Is Gay, 6" x 3" Sale price$7.49
Funny Warning Sticker - Driver Carries No Cash - Fucking BrokeFunny Warning Sticker Made in the USA
Sticker, Funny Warning Sticker, Driver Carries No Cash - Fucking Broke, 6" x 3" Sale price$7.49
Bumper Sticker - Middle Finger Loading Please WaitMade In The USA
Sticker, Bumper Sticker, Middle Finger Loading Please Wait, 10" x 3" Sale price$7.99
Bumper Sticker - If You're Going To Ride My Ass, Don't Forget To Kiss It Lifestyle Image - Going To Ride Ass, Don't Forget To Kiss It
Sticker, Bumper Sticker, If You're Going To Ride My Ass, Don't Forget To Kiss It, 10" x 3" Sale price$7.99
Bumper Sticker - I'm Bi-Sexual. Whenever I Want Sex I Have To Buy ItMade In The USA
Sticker, Bumper Sticker, I'm Bi-Sexual. Whenever I Want Sex I Have To Buy It, 10" x 3" Sale price$7.99
Bumper Sticker - High Gas Prices Suck Bend Over and Take It In The AssMade In The USA
Sticker, Bumper Sticker, High Gas Prices Suck Bend Over and Take It In The Ass, 5" x 3" Sale price$7.99
Bumper Sticker - Enough Of Your Douchebaggery Made In The USA
Sticker, Bumper Sticker, Enough Of Your Douchebaggery, 10" x 3" Sale price$7.99
Bumper Sticker - You Say Bitch Like It's A Bad ThingMade In The USA
Sticker, Bumper Sticker, You Say Bitch Like It's A Bad Thing, 10" x 3" Sale price$7.99
Bumper Sticker - If Weed Becomes Legal, I Can't Wait For The Commercials Made In The USA
Sticker, Bumper Sticker, If Weed Becomes Legal, I Can't Wait For The Commercials, 10" x 3" Sale price$7.99
Funny Warning Sticker - Bad Ass Rice BurnerThis Funny Warning Sticker is made in the USA!
Sticker, Funny Warning Sticker, Bad Ass Rice Burner, 6" x 3" Sale price$7.49
Bumper Sticker - A Friend In Need, Is A Pain In The Ass Made In The USA
Sticker, Bumper Sticker, A Friend In Need, Is A Pain In The Ass, 10" x 3" Sale price$7.99
Funny Warning Sticker - Driver Carries A Shitload Of Cash And A 1911This Funny Warning Sticker is made in the United States
Sticker, Funny Warning Sticker, Driver Carries A Shitload Of Cash And A 1911, 6" x 3" Sale price$7.49
Funny Warning Sticker - Bitch On BoardThis Funny Warning Sticker is made in the United States
Sticker, Funny Warning Sticker, Bitch On Board, 6" x 3" Sale price$7.49
Funny Warning Sticker - Crabby Bitch On BoardThis Funny Warning Sticker is made in the United States
Sticker, Funny Warning Sticker, Crabby Bitch On Board, 6" x 3" Sale price$7.49